One of the toughest things I face as a single mom is wondering if Mila has enough love.
It’s hard being away from her during the days, but I have to be to give her the life she deserves. When we’re together, we play, read stories, and create. I tell her I love her every chance I get and she does the same.
We’re happy in our own little world.
But, it’s the days I have to go away. I question if she forgets about all our fun. There are some times I wonder if the love I instill in her stays. Or if she’s just made at me when I’m gone.
A few nights ago, I realized I shouldn’t put any thought into those fears.
I picked her up one afternoon after school. She sat in the car as my mom told her goodbye. As usual, she asked for a hundred goodbye hugs and kisses. Then kept saying bye. As my mom walked away, then started the goodbye kisses.
She blew them and for awhile they were reciprocated. Mom had to go back inside, but Mila did something that made me smile.
As the door shut and we backed out of the driveway, I saw her continue blowing goodbye kisses.
Between each kiss, she yelled, “goodbye! I love you!.”
She didn’t stop when we backed out. Or when we went down the street. Or even parked in our driveway. Outside our door, she kept saying goodbye and how much she loved her Gigi.
That’s when I realized, Mila has all the love in the world. She knows what love feels like and how to feel it towards others.
All those worries about if I’m doing good enough ease.
The next morning, when it’s hard to go away again. I see her goodbye kisses in action. It made leaving a little easier.
Because, I know those goodbye kisses never end and that love travels where ever we go.